I’ve been seeing a lot of posts with tips and resources for those who've been thrust into a stay-at-home parent role. Those things are good and helpful.
But I can’t shake the nagging thought that the biggest advantage of being a stay-at-home parent is being missed. And that advantage is how many opportunities you have in the mundane moments of life to invest in your kids’ souls.
If I could sit down with you right now I’d want to know how you’re doing. What has been hard? What things are scary? And how can I be praying for you?
But I’d also want to leave you encouraged that God is with you and plead with you to use the time with your kids wisely.
This week I keep coming back to two thoughts about how to redeem the time you have with your kids. These thoughts are what I want to share with you today. But first, a reality check.
I don't do this stay-at-home mom thing well.
We have three girls who are 6.5, 5, and almost 3 years old. They're precious, fun, creative, inquisitive, and love to talk. It turns out that my patience level before having kids was more due to my circumstances than my character.
God has used parenting to grow and refine me. He's shown me his love through Scripture and Geoffrey's care for me. He's humbled me as I've experienced my limitations. So while I love being able to stay home to discipline, nurture, and instruct our children - it is hard work.We have three girls who are 6.5, 5, and almost 3 years old. They're precious, fun, creative, inquisitive, and love to talk. It turns out that my patience level before having kids was more due to my circumstances than my character.
The more kids we've had the more interruptions, messes, conflicts, laundry, and noise we have. But the opportunities to shepherd hearts, mold character, celebrate growth, and see God work have also increased.
Parents, You and Your Kids Need Jesus
When we live life close together it's messy. Some days it's downright hard and discouraging. Our kids sin daily and so do we. And one of the most important things our kids need to see is that we need Jesus.
Your kids don't need perfect parents - praise God! They need a perfect Savior. Ask to pray with and for your kids when they're struggling. Ask them to pray for you when you're struggling.
My girls now have permission to ask if they can pray for me when they see me struggling with anger. There's nothing quite as humbling as when your five-year-old prays, "Dear God, Mommy's struggling. Please help her be patient."
I often wish I was a better parent. And I pray I never stop striving to grow in loving the Lord and others. But I know my weaknesses may be some of the greatest ways God uses me. My failures are opportunities to point to God's faithfulness - not mine.
- Remind your kids of Christ's perfect work as you care for their hearts.
- Remind them that while they (and yourself) are impatient and quick to get angry, Jesus was patient and slow to anger.
- Remind them that we are selfish and disobedient. But Christ was perfectly selfless and obedient - to the point of taking the punishment of our sins on the cross.
Parents, Seek to Be Faithful Today
Paul admonishes the believers in Ephesus to
The rest of Ephesians then proceeds to flesh out how to make the best us of our time. God's will for believers includes the following command:"Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, making the best use of the time, because the days are evil. Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is." Ephesians 5:15–17, emphasis added
Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord." Ephesians 6:4, emphasis added.
Stop “trying” to make things turn out a particular way and just do the hard work of godly parenting. Do not judge its effectiveness by your child’s response. Simply wrestle with this:
- Is my parenting loving?
- Is it consistent?
- Is it wise?
That will be challenging enough. You will fail, be convicted, and need forgiveness on those fronts alone. The rest must be left to the work of the Spirit in a child’s life. ~"Parenting a difficult child"
Parents, God has perfectly ordained your circumstances today. It's not an accident that you have the number of children you do. It's not a mistake you have one (or several) children that are especially challenging.
Every moment of your life is perfectly crafted by a good and sovereign God to make you more like him. You can cry out to God when you're overwhelmed, exhausted, anxious, and defeated.
While you may not know what to pray for God's Spirit does. He helps us in our weakness and intercedes for us according to the will of God (Romans 8:26-27). And when you don't know what to do, ask God for wisdom because he has promised to give it to you (James 1:5).
Because of Christ our hope is secure. Our days are perfectly numbered by a God who did not spare his own Son but freely gave himself up for us all.
"Therefore, my beloved brothers, be steadfast, immovable, always abounding in the work of the Lord, knowing that in the Lord your labor is not in vain." 1 Corinthians 15:58
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* Photo by Skitterphoto on Pexels.
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